A Three-Step Guide to Using the Comments Section
True engagement requires that you leave your ego out of the conversation.
There is a problem in the comments section and I’m certain you’ve noticed it too. For some, these spaces provide a unique opportunity to learn amongst peers and contribute to a wider conversation. For others, it’s simply a place to vent and rage without accountability. Like the bathroom wall of a karaoke joint. Throw something up there because you can, who cares, right?
Just a few days ago a commenter started his message by stating proudly that he hadn’t even read my essay. He’d just seen the title and felt emboldened to act, based on the assumption that I’d probably missed a point which he alone could elucidate. He guessed, probably after peeping my avatar, that this young brown femme writer couldn’t possibly have a thorough understanding of such complex subject matter — red lip, smooth brain, right? Unfortunately for this hero, I had made his point. We can only imagine how embarrassed he might have been if only he’d had the shred of self-awareness necessary for such emotions.
If your bad behavior embarrasses you, congratulations, you can be saved.
I will say that something was refreshing about that commenter’s honesty. In an ocean of individuals spouting off in the response section, many haven’t read the work, but few are bold enough to admit it. On occasion — many — I’ve gone through the effort of pulling quotes from a piece that illuminate the very point that some aggrieved party has just boldly declared I’d missed. Even then most commenters will continue to deny having skimmed or scrolled right through the piece to the response section. Instead, they’ll often choose to argue that their lack of reading comprehension is rooted in the fact, not the unbiased opinion, that I’m just some dumb bitch. From there the conversation devolves quickly.
However, the very fact that these individuals feel compelled to gaslight, curse out, or straight up delete entire conversations to save face means that they, unlike our friend from earlier, are capable of feeling embarrassed. That in itself fills me with hope because if your bad behaviour embarrasses you, congratulations, you can be…
